The (not so unlikely) results that would see Chelsea relegated from the EPL

It couldn't happen, could it? Chelsea are already on 39 points, which would have been enough to stay up in all but four of the last 27 Premier League seasons, so probably not.

But we've worked out a set of not-all-that-unlikely results that would see Chelsea relegated from the top flight after a season in which they have spent nearly £600m. Did those eight-year contracts include relegation clauses?

Here are those results of the teams in the relegation battle, in order of where they would finish…

11th) West Ham: 31 points to 44 points

Bournemouth (A) W, Liverpool (H) D, Crystal Palace (A) W, Man City (A) L, Man Utd (H) D, Brentford (A) D, Leeds (H) D, Leicester (A) W.

If West Ham can draw with Arsenal at home, Liverpool and Manchester United should be no trouble. Manchester City away will be the only blip in what will otherwise be an unbeaten end to the season for David Moyes, who will cut Europa League Conference partying short to ensure a trouncing of Leicester on the final day. Cue Declan Rice tears in a fond farewell.

12th) Wolves: 34 points to 44 points

Leicester (A) W, Crystal Palace (H) W, Brighton (A) L, Aston Villa (A) W, Man Utd (A) D, Everton (H) L, Arsenal (A) L.

They'll get thumped away at Brighton and Arsenal, who will need to win by an eight-goal margin on the final day to trump Manchester City but will fall just short against a Wolves side very much on the beach. The job will have been done long before for Julen Lopetegui's men, with three points against end-of-season whipping boys Leicester, and a ground-out win at Selhurst Park all-but securing their Premier League survival. Diego Costa will score all three of their remaining goals.

13th) Bournemouth: 33 points to 43 points

West Ham (H) L, Southampton (A) W, Leeds (H) L, Chelsea (H) W, Crystal Palace (A) W, Man Utd (H) L, Everton (A) D.

Chelsea old boy Dominic Solanke to score the winner at Stamford Bridge as Bournemouth's striker-less opponents notch the highest xG in recorded history without scoring a goal. Gary O'Neil takes all the acclaim and the Tottenham job.

14th) Crystal Palace: 36 points to 42 points

Everton (H) L, Wolves (A) L, West Ham (H) L, Tottenham (A) W, Bournemouth (H) L, Fulham (A) W, Nottingham Forest (H) L.

A rotten run of defeats to benefit their relegation rivals (and us for the purposes of this article) will test Roy's blood pressure, but big away wins at Spurs (where the home fans will have entirely turned on their own team) and Fulham (who will have nothing to play for) will be enough for them.

15th) Everton: 27 points to 41 points

Crystal Palace (A) W, Newcastle (H) W, Leicester (A) W, Brighton (A) D, Man City (H) L, Wolves (A) W, Bournemouth (H) D.

Dominic Calvert-Lewin to return and start scoring as Newcastle get the willies at Goodison Park with Brighton and Aston Villa breathing down their necks in the race for Champions League football. The Everton players are booed off at half-time on the final day as they're behind against Bournemouth, but those boos turn to cheers at the final whistle as a draw ensures their top-flight status after chaos at Stamford Bridge.

16th) Nottingham Forest: 27 points to 41 points

Liverpool (A) L, Brighton (H) W, Brentford (A) D, Southampton (H) W, Chelsea (A) W, Arsenal (H) D, Crystal Palace (H) W.

Fortress City Ground will provide three wins and a draw from their final four home games, and Steve Cooper's side will win just their second away game of the season at Stamford Bridge in that relegation six-pointer. Frank Lampard's request to become player-manager, with Chelsea goalless in their last seven, will be denied by the Premier League before kick-off.

17th) Leeds: 29 points to 40 points

Fulham (A) D, Leicester (H) W, Bournemouth (A) W, Man City (A) L, Newcastle (H) L, West Ham (A) D, Tottenham (H) W.

Wins against Leicester and Bournemouth give them hope but Leeds look dead and buried with ten minutes to go in the season. With four teams battling to avoid the last relegation spot on the final day, the Forest fans are jubilantly throwing the inflatables around by half-time as they lead Palace 3-0, Everton are drawing with Bournemouth and need to lose for Leeds to overtake them, and although Leeds' goal difference is now superior to Chelsea's after Lampard's side were hit for five by Arsenal, four by Manchester United and seven by Manchester City, remarkably, Chelsea have scored and lead against Newcastle.

18th) Chelsea: 39 points to 40 points

Man Utd TBD (A) L, Brentford (H) D, Arsenal (A) L, Bournemouth (A) L, Nottingham Forest (H) L, Manchester City (A) L, Newcastle (H) L.

A bore 0-0 draw against Brentford is met by a chorus of boos at Stamford Bridge and another dressing down by Todd Boehly, who goes around each player in turn, points at them and simply says “embarrassing”. No goals for and 24 against heading into the final day, Chelsea no longer have a goal difference advantage, but need just a draw to be sure of their Premier League survival.

Mason Mount, handed his first start since mid-February, scores a cracker early in the second half to ease concerns, but Lampard rings the changes on the hour mark in an attempt to shut up shop and panic sets in as Newcastle pile on the pressure. A goal each for Alexander Isak and Callum Wilson in stoppage time condemns Chelsea to the Championship, at which point they beg Mount to stay amid an exodus and he tells them to f*** right off. Lampard stays, though. Every cloud.