James, Batshuayi, Heynckes, Boateng, Zentner: the best Bundesliga quotes of the season

It has been another vintage Bundesliga season, with the number of wisecracks to the cameras off the pitch the only match for the number of goals flying in on the pitch.

In that spirit, bundesliga.com has selected some of the season's best, most memorable quotes.

"We've dropped two points again today," said Kevin-Prince Boateng after Eintracht Frankfurt lost 1-0 at home to Wolfsburg on Matchday 2.

Asked about what reasons he had for hoping for a Germany call-up following a run of good form, Hoffenheim's Nico Schulz responded in deadpan fashion: "Well, I'm German."

James Rodriguez's stunning free-kick against Bayer Leverkusen on Matchday 18 generated global headlines: "It was a nice goal, up there with the best I've ever scored," he told bundesliga.com afterwards.

When asked about why he was sent to the stands in Freiburg's 2-0 defeat to Schalke on Matchday 28, Christian Streich responded: "I didn't overreact, I just used a swear word."

Tom Starke's one-game return to the Bayern goal in Matchday 15's 1-0 win at Eintracht Frankfurt, after retiring at the end of last season, made Javi Martinez chuckle: "He looks like a 50-year-old, but plays like he's 28," said the Spaniard.

When asked after Schalke came from four goals down to draw 4-4 at Borussia Dortmund if he had always believed in his side's ability to bounce back, Domenico Tedesco replied: "I didn't think we'd turn it around. I asked the fourth official after 25 minutes if we could reduce the game to 70 minutes."

Probed for his thoughts on life in Bremen soon after his arrival, Chinese forward Yuning Zhang was less than complimentary: "I went to a basement restaurant and ate a local Bremen dish. I wouldn't say I like the food, but I wouldn't say I hate it, either."

Kramer scored a stunning free-kick in Borussia Mönchengladbach's 3-0 win against Wolfsburg on Matchday 31, much to the surprise of his coach Dieter Hecking: "I saw the goal on TV and watched him putting it down. I didn't watch any more because I thought the lads would make sure he left it alone."

Jupp Heynckes began one recent press conference with an amusing tale: "I got into the lift this morning and an elderly couple noticed I had a shopping bag with a Bayern Munich badge on it. She said: 'Oh, you're a Bayern Munich fan?' 'Yes, sure!' I responded."

Speaking about Niklas Süle's own-goal against Cologne on Matchday 33, Thomas Müller said: "It didn't really go according to plan, but he did finish it fantastically."

Speaking prior to Hoffenheim's 2-0 win against Bayern Munich on Matchday 3, Julian Nagelsmann compared his and Carlo Ancelotti's coaching experience: "He's won more trophies than I have boxers or polo shirts in my wardrobe."

In party mood following Frankfurt's 1-0 DFB Cup semi-final win against Schalke, Boateng said: "You get fined if you're home before 4am!"

Prior to Bayern's meeting with Real Madrid in the UEFA Champions League, Sandro Wagner was asked about Cristiano Ronaldo: "It's actually mad how many goals he scores. I don't think I score as many goals in training as he does in a game."

Freiburg striker Nils Petersen is renowned as a supersub, but Streich sees it differently: "If Nils plays from the start, then he can't be brought on. That's a fact."

Stuttgart skipper Christian Gentner saw the funny side of his mid-air clash with Wolfsburg goalkeeper Koen Casteels: "My wife told me I should have had an operation like this years ago," he said of having to wear a mask.

missed Bayern's Matchday 22 2-1 win against Schalke due to illness. Fortunately he had recovered in time to tell this story in his next press conference: "I was really struggling on Friday and Saturday, and I crawled into bed at quarter past three. Do you know when I woke up? Just after seven – the game against Schalke was 35 minutes in! I felt a bit bad."

Facing Bayern is a tough prospect for any opposition coach, as Hertha Berlin's Pal Dardai pointed out: "I went specially to the library to look for the book titled 'How do you beat Bayern?' I didn't find it."

Mainz goalkeeper Robin Zentner on his air-kick against Borussia Mönchengladbach: "The ball came back to me with a bit of spin and out of the corner of my eye I saw something white and thought it was the ball. It was in fact the penalty spot and the ball was somewhere else! I tried to play a pass to Jean [Gbamin] and then realised the ball's not there.”

When asked what persuaded him to come out of retirement to rescue Bayern's season, Heynckes offered a surprising answer: "My daughter and my wife advised me to do it, and then Cando [his dog] barked twice. That was that, really."

"Maybe people thought I wasn't going to be playing," quipped Wagner after Hoffenheim failed to sell out their UEFA Europa League meeting with Braga.

Asked about the reasons behind his move to Borussia Dortmund, Chelsea loanee Michy Batshuayi did not take too long to come up with a response: "I love black and yellow. Black is Batman, and yellow is Spongebob!"

Always good for a one-liner, Müller caused much mirth when asked about wearing the Bayern armband: "There's not really one that fits my thin biceps. I suppose I'll have to work out a bit more."

Wagner's first goal back in Bayern colours came against former club Hoffenheim, with the 30-year-old in typically confident mood afterwards: "In my eyes I'm the best German striker. And without relying on statistics, as I couldn’t care less about those. To me, it's just important that my performance is up to standard."

Duisburg goalkeeper Mark Flekken went viral after popping for a drink inside his own goal - while the opposition had the ball: "I'd seen the boys go off to celebrate in the corner and they weren't paying attention to the assistant referee. Then I switched off and wanted to go and drink. I think that's the last time I leave my water bottle in my goal."

"He used his left leg today; normally he just uses that for standing," said Heynckes when asked about Müller's second goal of the season.

An uncharacteristic error from Schalke's Ralf Fährmann allowed Werder Bremen to run out 2-1 winners at the Veltins Arena on Matchday 21. Will you sleep well after the mistake was the first question the goalkeeper fielded post-match: "After a few beers, definitely."

Usain Bolt's trial at Dortmund also generated worldwide headlines: "Everyone feels like I'm just kidding around – [that] I'm joking. But I'm serious. I'm actually going back to Dortmund in a couple of weeks to work with them for three more weeks just to assess myself at a better level - to see what level I'm at or what I need to do, or if I can."

Gladbach's pitch for the Matchday 23 meeting with Borussia Dortmund caused some raised eyebrows: "It was about as good as my garden," said Mario Götze.

Leon Bailey's international future – he could represent Jamaica, England or Malta – has been the subject of much discussion. A source close to the player told bundesliga.com that the Bayer Leverkusen winger has "English ancestry; Malta by merit options".

Asked by bundesliga.com for his plans to celebrate Fortuna Düsseldorf's promotion, striker Rouwen Hennings only had one thing in mind: "We're going to drink Düsseldorf dry!"

Bayer Leverkusen attacking midfielder Julian Brandt on the role of tactics: "Tactics are important, because otherwise we'd be playing as we did at under-13 level and all just chasing the ball around. That doesn't make any sense. But for me the most important thing, tactically speaking, is how the coach envisions how you play. You can then use that as a reference point, without becoming obsessed by it. After all, it's we players who are out there on the pitch and football is still all about inspiration, creativity and having fun."