From a man who once claimed his Chelsea side was a 'little horse that needs milk and needs to learn how to jump,' Jose Mourinho has produced another analogy for the ages.
Back in 2006 he was scared of swans, in 2007 he likened an injury crisis to owning a blanket that is too small for him and in 2010 he informed that world that he was, in fact, not the fictional wizard, Harry Potter.
But now Mourinho is Tottenham manager and his love for bizarre analogies took hold of him in his pre-Champions League press conference when he said that Spurs are 'hanging on the balcony of the fourth floor,' a nod to their precarious injury situation.
The Portuguese revealed that South Korean forward Son Heung-min may miss the remainder of the season after he suffered a broken arm in the first minute of the win over Aston Villa.
With Harry Kane also expected to play no part for the remainder of the campaign after sustaining a hamstring injury against Southampton, Mourinho is down to a threadbare squad and he likened it to potentially falling off a hotel balcony.
'When we arrived we were on the minus-12th floor, we got on the stairs and we started climbing,' Mourinho began, prefacing the prepared speech with his love for anecdotes, in case anyone had forgotten his previous ones.
'But immediately in the beginning, the stairs broke so we were in trouble and we were finding a way to try to get up.
'We found a way, with a lot of work and a lot of effort and we started going and going and going, and when we arrive on the fourth floor, which was where we wanted to arrive, somebody came and took the stairs away.
'So now we are in trouble. Now we have two options. One is to give up and we will fall and normally die – because it's the fourth floor.
'Another way is to fight with what we have, no stairs but arms. So, we're going to be on that balcony fighting with everything that we have.'
Hilariously wacky analogies are commonplace for Mourinho and it is often when his side enters an injury crisis that they get even more bizarre.
With Chelsea's wealth of options dramatically reduced and the transfer window no longer open, Mourinho used a blanket and a supermarket as the way to illustrate his struggles
'It is like having a blanket that is too small for the bed,' he said. 'You pull the blanket up to keep your chest warm and your feet stick out.
'I cannot buy a bigger blanket because the supermarket is closed. But I am content because the blanket is cashmere. It is no ordinary blanket.'
He can often dabble in popular culture and showed he is down with the kids when he used Harry Potter to tee off his less-than-impressive start as Real Madrid boss.
After a 0-0 draw against Real Mallorca in his first game in charge, he said: 'Look, I'm a coach. I'm not Harry Potter. He is magical, but in reality, there is no magic. Magic is fiction and football is real.'
sitaring
0
3...., that’s 3 more than spurs if you can count😂
yes only 3, sadly. and who's talking about spurs? insisting so much hoping that i'm a spurs fan?
Highburyheros
0
lol man utd won bunch of epl titles.. how many did arsenal had?
3...., that’s 3 more than spurs if you can count😂
sitaring
0
Knew you would be silenced.. 🤐
i'm not the kind who stuck on a phone screen all day like you boi. we adults have responsibilities to attend to
sitaring
0
It’s not hate kid, just the truth kid, also we are a successful club kid.. what you won in 35 years kid.. ... 3 trophies kid that’s what..🤐🤐😂🤐😂
google hero definitely 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
sitaring
0
Oh and Leicester have won the epl... Have you ?? 🤐
lol man utd won bunch of epl titles.. how many did arsenal had?
Sudhir_Gosavi
2
like Spanish la leaga allowed Barca to buy striker , the EPL also allow Tottenham to buy one striker
Highburyheros
1
I just love this guy ..you can listen to him whole day .. he's soo different than other managers .. he's honest .. straight forward ..
Exactly
ElCanops
0
He doesn’t learn... you wait and see
okayyy
ElCanops
0
Not the point wether they are successful or not.. He’s not bigger than any club.. They pay his wages.... it’s called respect...
nobody is bigger than club ..not even players who think that they are bigger than club .. they are not
Highburyheros
0
It’s not hate kid, just the truth kid, also we are a successful club kid.. what you won in 35 years kid.. ... 3 trophies kid that’s what..🤐🤐😂🤐😂
Knew you would be silenced.. 🤐
Highburyheros
0
you're so hateful it's toxic. definitely an angry and jealous arsenal fan. winning 4-0 yet stuck in 10th
Oh and Leicester have won the epl... Have you ?? 🤐
Highburyheros
0
you're so hateful it's toxic. definitely an angry and jealous arsenal fan. winning 4-0 yet stuck in 10th
It’s not hate kid, just the truth kid, also we are a successful club kid.. what you won in 35 years kid.. ... 3 trophies kid that’s what..🤐🤐😂🤐😂
sitaring
0
He is so stupid he confuses himself!!
you're so hateful it's toxic. definitely an angry and jealous arsenal fan. winning 4-0 yet stuck in 10th
Highburyheros
0
yeah all that was wrong .. so what do you want to do now ..
He doesn’t learn... you wait and see
Highburyheros
0
yeah it's alright ..you be happy .. jose is bad guy bad manager bad man .. happy now .. Manchester United didn't had any problem only problem was jose .. look at United now ..they are soooooo successful without him ..pogba soo greatttt .. etc etc etc ... 👍🏻
Not the point wether they are successful or not.. He’s not bigger than any club.. They pay his wages.... it’s called respect...
ElCanops
0
You don’t see him abusing wenger or guardiola or Benitez.. yer deaf or very biased.. also poking that man in the eye at a match.. come on kid, that’s low life...
yeah all that was wrong .. so what do you want to do now ..
Highburyheros
1
hahahahaha .. do you even watch his interviews .. or only read what papers say ..
You don’t see him abusing wenger or guardiola or Benitez.. yer deaf or very biased.. also poking that man in the eye at a match.. come on kid, that’s low life...
ElCanops
0
Also look at his mouth towards other managers! He has no class.. Ferguson/ wenger/pep... they have more respect!!
hahahahaha .. do you even watch his interviews .. or only read what papers say ..
ElCanops
0
He got sacked from Utd cos he lost the dressing room.. He thinks he is bigger than the clubs.. That’s why they sack him...
yeah it's alright ..you be happy .. jose is bad guy bad manager bad man .. happy now .. Manchester United didn't had any problem only problem was jose .. look at United now ..they are soooooo successful without him ..pogba soo greatttt .. etc etc etc ... 👍🏻
Highburyheros
1
with pogba , shaw and ndombele it was fair .. pogba himself is problematic .. nd shaw never lived upto his potential .. nd now ndombele situation. ... he's is always injured .. by Mourinho talking about in public was to force .. Ndombele to put more efforts towards his fitness .. team needs ndombele ..nd he needs to be fit nd performing .. you need to understand psychology .. Mourinho is old school .. he doesn't like soft babies ..spoil brats .. who can't take it up like a man .. he criticised John Terry in public ..but John Terry understood he needed to perform better ..so he improved himself instead of hating the manager ..
Also look at his mouth towards other managers! He has no class.. Ferguson/ wenger/pep... they have more respect!!
Highburyheros
1
I just love this guy ..you can listen to him whole day .. he's soo different than other managers .. he's honest .. straight forward ..
He got sacked from Utd cos he lost the dressing room.. He thinks he is bigger than the clubs.. That’s why they sack him...
Viealnsz
3
By The Grace Of God Tottenham will go through tonight
ElCanops
0
He still does it now, he hasn’t learned.. pogos and shaw at Utd... the new spurs midfielder he kept accusing of being injured.. He always wants a get out clause when things go wrong!
with pogba , shaw and ndombele it was fair .. pogba himself is problematic .. nd shaw never lived upto his potential .. nd now ndombele situation. ... he's is always injured .. by Mourinho talking about in public was to force .. Ndombele to put more efforts towards his fitness .. team needs ndombele ..nd he needs to be fit nd performing .. you need to understand psychology .. Mourinho is old school .. he doesn't like soft babies ..spoil brats .. who can't take it up like a man .. he criticised John Terry in public ..but John Terry understood he needed to perform better ..so he improved himself instead of hating the manager ..
Highburyheros
0
I agree .. in the past he has record of blaming others ..which I don't like .. but it came with his mentality nd personality .. he can't accept defeat .. he has ego .. nd his bossy nature .. everyone has some faults with them .. but he is good too .. his relationship with Esein in Chelsea .. relationship with players in inter .. etoo , esein , ibrahimovic , lukaku , drogba , terry , xabi alonso , ..
He still does it now, he hasn’t learned.. pogos and shaw at Utd... the new spurs midfielder he kept accusing of being injured.. He always wants a get out clause when things go wrong!
Highburyheros
0
yea you have a history right you were invincible but what are u right now defines you replacing emery won't help😂 good ebning for now
We’ve won 3 fa cups in the last 6 years. Tell me what you have done.. You think your a big club.. explain ?.... 🤫
AyushmanKatoch
1
Silly kid!! We have history child.. You haven’t won league for 59 years kid!! 3 trophies in 35 years kid!! Embarrassing kid!! No history . Child..🤫🤐
yea you have a history right you were invincible but what are u right now defines you replacing emery won't help😂 good ebning for now
Highburyheros
1
better arsenal fan Don't speak, ur manager is a kid 37 right zlatan is elder than him so shut up and try to be in the leauge next season or u are trying to become the invincibles in championship as pl is out of ur leauge 😂😂
You’ll never know what invincibles are KID!!
kameinosuy
2
Mr levy deserve this for not getting enough strikers by knowing kane injury... The cl spot is in danger now..
Highburyheros
1
better arsenal fan Don't speak, ur manager is a kid 37 right zlatan is elder than him so shut up and try to be in the leauge next season or u are trying to become the invincibles in championship as pl is out of ur leauge 😂😂
Silly kid!! We have history child.. You haven’t won league for 59 years kid!! 3 trophies in 35 years kid!! Embarrassing kid!! No history . Child..🤫🤐
AyushmanKatoch
0
Tottenham still have the best man for crisis situations because Mourinho is a master tactician... I expect him to turn things around by setting up a counter-attacking side, but they'd definitely miss them finishers, especially Harry Kane
yes Harry kane is essential we can se by the number of misses in every match though now the job lies on the shoulder of moura and lamela
AyushmanKatoch
1
Cry cry cry—— moanrinho..., always has an excuse...😂
better arsenal fan Don't speak, ur manager is a kid 37 right zlatan is elder than him so shut up and try to be in the leauge next season or u are trying to become the invincibles in championship as pl is out of ur leauge 😂😂
ElCanops
0
Honest ?..... always blames players when things go wrong... look at his track record
I agree .. in the past he has record of blaming others ..which I don't like .. but it came with his mentality nd personality .. he can't accept defeat .. he has ego .. nd his bossy nature .. everyone has some faults with them .. but he is good too .. his relationship with Esein in Chelsea .. relationship with players in inter .. etoo , esein , ibrahimovic , lukaku , drogba , terry , xabi alonso , ..
ElCanops
0
Honest ?..... always blames players when things go wrong... look at his track record
look you can find faults in everyone .. what I mean by honest is .. he's honest with his emotions , analysis , explanations in press conference .. of course he does many things in not good manner ..but he's still amazing .. he's the only manager whom I want to listen .. because others try to hard to hide things ..he is more open .. if he feels something wrong about player he says it ..so the player work hard nd prove him wrong on the pitch .. he is old school ..
Highburyheros
0
I just love this guy ..you can listen to him whole day .. he's soo different than other managers .. he's honest .. straight forward ..
Honest ?..... always blames players when things go wrong... look at his track record
Highburyheros
0
He is not English but he speak and understand English better than the best English professor in England.That is mourinho for you
He is so stupid he confuses himself!!
Highburyheros
1
Cry cry cry—— moanrinho..., always has an excuse...😂
Reebelmpuy
2
Jose plz now give the son's place to giovani lo celso
Yusuf_Tokee
1
Tottenham still have the best man for crisis situations because Mourinho is a master tactician... I expect him to turn things around by setting up a counter-attacking side, but they'd definitely miss them finishers, especially Harry Kane
FaithEvans
6
Jose Mourinho, love him or hate him but you can never ignore him... absolute box office!
dkw25
1
find me a manager like Jose he have about 10 different personality lol
klenamwacc
4
He is not English but he speak and understand English better than the best English professor in England.That is mourinho for you
Omakasee
4
in jose we trust
hilariousval
4
Football World is good with the likes of people like MOURINHO.
SH221B
4
From Special one to Logical one, just Mourinho things
ElCanops
5
mourinho .. this guy is blessing for football world ❤️
ElCanops
6
I just love this guy ..you can listen to him whole day .. he's soo different than other managers .. he's honest .. straight forward ..
tuybdiklny
4
Perfect talk. No author puts it better.