Sammy McIlroy tells two rather traumatic stories about going out to get fish and chips.
The first ended with the late Brian Greenhoff, his friend and team-mate, having a gun pulled on him in a Sydney chippy while they were on tour in 1975 after helping Manchester United win promotion back to the top flight.
‘The hotel reception recommended it and I said to Brian, “You go”,’ recalled McIlroy. ‘He ran back to the room white as a ghost.’
Greenhoff escaped injury that night but McIlroy was not so lucky when he drove his pregnant wife-to-be Cynthia to pick up a supper in Stretford two years earlier.
Their car was hit with such force that a fire crew had to cut them out of the wreckage. McIlroy, just 18 at the time, bore the brunt of the impact.
‘Cynthia told me that when the fire brigade and ambulance arrived she heard one of the people say, “Make sure she’s all right, forget about him”. They actually thought I was dead,’ said McIlroy, who suffered a collapsed lung, four broken ribs and head wounds.
‘I was in a coma for a few days. The doctor told me afterwards it was my fitness that pulled me through. Luckily everything was all right and my son Sammy was born. In hospital, I read about Tommy Docherty bringing in players left, right and centre. I was thinking that could be the end of me at United.’
The Northern Irishman ended up spending 13 years at Old Trafford. He made a goalscoring debut in the Manchester derby and later had an unhappy season at City — No 4 on the list of only 14 players to represent both clubs post-war.
Now 66, the divorced father of three (he also has two daughters, Louise and Faye, as well as son Sammy) has become a popular figure in the match-day lounges at Old Trafford in recent years. He plays for United’s veterans team too, so no guessing where his loyalties will lie in Saturday's 183rd Manchester derby.
McIlroy was the last of the Busby Babes. The final signing made by United’s legendary manager before Sir Matt stepped down in 1969.
He got to follow his hero George Best from Belfast to Old Trafford, but his timing was out.
A team that had lifted the European Cup a year earlier were about to hit a downward spiral that would end in the unthinkable: relegation to the Second Division.
At first, McIlroy suffered from chronic homesickness that was only made worse by having to leave his parents in East Belfast with the city under curfew at the height of The Troubles.
‘Vigilantes protecting the streets were knocking on people’s doors to get the men to walk with them. My dad actually turned them down which was probably not the right thing to do,’ said McIlroy who made his Northern Ireland debut in Hull because their opponents Spain would not risk travelling to Belfast.
‘I had some friends who lost their lives getting involved in shootings. When your parents are involved you think anything can happen with stray bullets flying.
‘Manchester United were great with that because they got my mum and dad out of there.’
McIlroy made his senior debut against City at the age of 17, although he headed to the club on a bus that day thinking he was going to help collect the dirty kit. Instead, he was a late replacement for the injured Denis Law. He scored in a 3-3 draw at Maine Road and in the next three games as well.
However, United’s European Cup-winning team was breaking up and Best was going AWOL.
‘When you win the European Cup and Sir Matt calls it a day, it’s very difficult,’ said McIlroy. ‘It was a no-win situation for Wilf McGuinness taking over.
‘There were some fantastic players coming to the twilight of their careers, all these superstars we had. When you think of the likes of Paddy Crerand, Bobby Charlton was in his 30s, Denis Law had a few injuries. How can you get people to match them?
‘Once those players drifted away and Bestie started going a wee bit wayward, everything went downhill.
‘It upset the senior players with what was happening to George. Everyone wanted him in the team because he could win a game with a bit of magic. But I think he got the hump because the club weren’t trying to rebuild around him.’
McGuinness was swiftly replaced as manager by Frank O’Farrell and then it was Docherty’s turn in the hot seat.
He could not avoid relegation in April 1974 when a crestfallen Law backheeled Manchester City to victory against his old club as Birmingham’s win over Norwich condemned United to the drop.
Referee David Smith ended the game after fans invaded the Old Trafford pitch for a second time.
‘Denis didn’t send us down, results went against us anyway,’ said McIlroy. ‘But once Denis walked off that was the end for the fans. Bang. We’d gone. It was the quietest dressing room I’ve ever been in. People with their heads in their hands realising that the great Manchester United — European champions six years ago — were now in the Second Division.
‘It was unbelievably painful. Embarrassing. An absolute nightmare for any United player. People asked what was going on and I had no answer.’
McIlroy went on holiday with Greenhoff and their families and was left in no doubt how the fans felt. ‘People say things when they’ve got drink in them. Relegation was hard to take.’
He remembers the pleasure other clubs took at seeing United humbled and being spat at when they faced a hostile reception at away grounds the following season.
‘We were there to be got at it in the Second Division,’ he said. ‘It used to be difficult getting on to the bus. There was a hell of a lot of abuse and sometimes it was very scary.’
Relegation provided the impetus for United’s revival under Docherty. They swept to the Division Two title, entertaining packed stadiums up and down the country.
‘That was the turning point for Manchester United to become great again. Even fans now talk about those days,’ said McIlroy.
He established himself at the heart of a vibrant attacking team featuring Gordon Hill, Steve Coppell, Lou Macari, Stuart Pearson and Jimmy Greenhoff that reached the FA Cup final three times in four years.
United bounced back from an upset at the hands of Second Division Southampton in 1976 to beat favourites Liverpool the following year, but McIlroy’s late equaliser could not prevent another heartbreaking defeat to Arsenal in 1979.
‘We were a cracking cup side,’ he said. ‘Every professional footballer wanted to play in the Cup final at Wembley and we were lucky enough to do it three times.’
McIlroy believes Docherty could have enjoyed greater success in time, but the Scot was sacked in 1977 over an affair with the wife of United physio Laurie Brown.
There is no shortage of stories about The Doc.
McIlroy remembers going to a youth team tournament with United in Switzerland soon after recovering from his car accident and getting drunk on three halves of lager. ‘They told me on the bus to the airport that the boss had spiked my drinks!’
One journey on the team coach saw Docherty go berserk after the players locked him in the cramped toilet. Another saw the manager threaten to throw Gerry Daly off the coach somewhere in Yorkshire until he sang The Boxer by Simon and Garfunkel.
Docherty was succeeded by the more pragmatic Dave Sexton and then the equally colourful Ron Atkinson.
People think McIlroy’s time at United was up once Atkinson signed Bryan Robson, but he blames it on his decision to walk off a team flight to Kuala Lumpur as it was about to depart.
‘Biggest mistake of my life,’ admits McIlroy, who had been delayed at Heathrow for five hours on the way back from a World Cup qualifier in Sweden and wanted to spend a night with his family before flying long-haul to Malaysia.
‘I just couldn’t face it. Big Ron held it against me and rightly so. I was wrong. He said, “No one walks off a plane at Manchester” and fined me two weeks’ wages.
‘I scored a hat-trick against Wolves on the day Bryan was signed on the pitch at Old Trafford and I could have played on the left side of him. Ron hinted at that. But not long after he called me in and asked me how much I thought I was worth. Stoke had made a club-record bid of £350,000. It knocked me for six. My pride was hurt and I signed for Stoke.
‘Two days later Howard Kendall phoned me and asked why I didn’t speak to him. Nobody told me that Everton, who were fantastic in the mid-80s, had come in for me. I held that grudge for a number of years.’
McIlroy left United after playing 419 times and scoring 71 goals for the club. He returned to Manchester for one season at City but it did not work out. He was hindered by achilles problems and their fans could not forget his past.
‘I used to get “the last Busby Babe this and that, get back to United”. I got booed in the warm-up,’ he said.
‘Even though I scored on my debut, a section of the fans just didn’t take to me. I played in a derby against United at Maine Road and I got a better reception off the United fans than I did off City, so I knew the writing was on the wall.’
McIlroy played in Sweden and Austria before finishing his career in the lower divisions around the north-west of England.
He won 89 caps for Northern Ireland, appearing in the 1982 World Cup in Spain and captaining Billy Bingham’s team in the 1986 tournament in Mexico.
McIlroy also managed his country and achieved success at club level, guiding both Macclesfield Town and Morecambe into the Football League.
When he decided to leave Morecambe in 2011, he was 55 and has not worked in management since. Did he have more to give?
‘One hundred per cent,’ he said. ‘I definitely left too soon and that is a big regret. I’ve made some bad decisions in my career.’